Boarding School

Note: - The mentioned incidents are of my friend and colleague Santanu. Also, special thanks to Kalpana for her creative drawings.

“Hit….hit…hit it man”…..”O Crap! ………What Hanu….you again did a foul…we are loosing guy…… you know it right!!!”

“Ouu… The fewer rules a coach has, the fewer rules there are for players to break Gudla”….huh!! (The sound was quite sharp in a very well framed Hinglish Ishytle)”

“Aaaha!!........now that’s my boy……I can proudly say he carries my genes safely and nicely”…….the words simply got discharged from my 40 years old cracked epiglottis after watching the football match of kids, playing in the water crammed field……..well the very innovative game is called as “Water Fussball”

Yah…yaaah….. It’s my cute and lovely kid Hanu. Hanu, who got his name as a derivative of my break-up name “Santanu = Sant + Hanu”, where Hanu means monkey in Bengali. His name was kept when his father himself was a kid…….hmm!!...not to be surprised …it happens only in India.

Well….don’t know exactly when this “Water Fussball” match made me slipped on the floors of the cubicle of my memory track and I finally started turning the pages of my childhood recollection album……….and heard the tickled voice…………………

“Santanu………chup koro…..chup, darao…..nahole chap-e pore jabe…. bipode fele debo ami” …….and I almost doubled my horse power to escape from my Head master after learning his verrrrrrrrrry sweeeeet intention.


Can’t help it man… It was poor me only, who got caught red-handed while throwing the tea at the poster of Maa durga, prepared by the gurukul’s student, for the durga-pooja ceremony. Actually, I was passing by the art room, carrying glasses of tea to my room. I then unthoughtfully stopped, to check out the paintings………but tell me how can I help myself if I too wish to add my own views to the painting? So, without resisting the thought, I simply drew her moustaches and gave shades to her body with the tea.....

My house warden, having seen this, ran after me like a mad dog, he very quickly picked up the broom and started opening it’s nut-bolts to loosen the attached pipe and……..and my dear friend rest was the story………….the story of his instant invention of a music piece, by considering me as a drum and the broom’s pipe as a drum stick.

Aaaah! He was not that bad also, he then later visited my room with some candies to show his expression of concern…the very same candies which he gives after every beat…but this time, since I got the cruel thrash, so I prepared myself to not to get convinced over such a small treat and therefore, I demanded him an Ice-cream!!

I suppose that this was the first case of violence which I scripted down in my diary. Yes! The diary writing was the part of course-curriculum of our prestigious Rama Krishna Mission Hostel (Hotel) - Ashram. The activity was introduced to cultivate good habits in the students.

So, this time I had something new to letter down in my diary apart from my usual complaints… ….complaints like……my room-mate didn’t share the biscuit with me, Soumya helped me in cheating in class-test and how I took revenge from Soumesh by making him eat his favourite hajmola goli, by first keeping it down on bathroom’s floor for a while and then handing it to him with a notorious thought of making him eat the highly toxic goli………..

Well, apart from diary writing, my school has enforced several other activities to grow children into a perfect human being. Activities like doing at least one act of random kindness in a day (Good turn knot in Boys Scout) like teaching the villagers, writing exam paper for blind students, clean surroundings or plant a tree.

Sighhhh!!!!Definitely, my Gurukal was way different from other boarding schools.

Our day always started at 5am when, the poor, small, lazy kid’s of 5^th standard were asked to wake up and perform PT under the rising sun. After horrible exercise, we were told to join in the prayer hall in dhoti-kurta which was then followed by a meditation (Extra sleeping hours) for 15mins.

By checking out such a tight and strict schedule, you can easily estimate the amount of love that our parents had for us and their great will of making us a perfect human.

The decision to send me to a boarding school, at the age of 9, was not a random take but it was me only who broke down all the records of their patience level. Let me share with you people the incident that nailed the final decision of my parents of sending me to a boarding school.

It was the month of July, the rainy season has just got started. Those days, I developed an unsaid relationship with the creatures. The bond was developed when I used to row my paper boat in a water lodged area. Now, the earthworm, toads and flies had become my best friends. The nature attracted me so much that I decided to make these creatures part and parcel of my house. So, with this intention, I caught few fishes and crabs from the nearby pond and decanted them into the well, the traditional well of our family at the backyard of my house. On regular basis, I used to see my fishes swim. My newly built well aquarium made me happy all the time. But the feeling did not continue for longer period as after few days, I could not find my fishes swimming at the surface of the water. Hence, I decided to go inside the well to check them out. The only thought which made me think twice of the adventure was to check if my parents are away. But time! you have good time and also you have bad time…………. and certainly it was my bad time when my father caught me doing the stunt. Alas! It was not me only who got the thrash but to my friend also, who was helping me. The end of the rope was tied to my waist so as to help me climb down the walls of the well whereas the other end was held by him.

It would be hard to believe the after-effect of our accidental-caught….the reaction of my father was so unexpected that my friend got wet control the nature’s call.

“Akkebare niche chole giye tor kaaj kormo sere ne (go into it and do all your curious works!)” my father yelled while hanging me upside down inside the well……lolz!!...but that time it was so scary that it made my vocals to repeat only one word “Bachaaaaaaaaaaaooooooooo”

Nothing new, it was almost my daily job to act naughty. My mischevious plans and wayward tricks had no end. I remember the very recipe of making a toxin for my neighbor’s dog, which I hated like anything. The recipe was prepared by mixing Colgate, oil, charcoal, fevicol, washing powder, waste food and datura. Though, it is another fact that the inventive mixture didn’t help me to encash my hatred towards him as he did not eat the offered bread (with the toxic spread over it). I suppose he sensed the underlying wicked idea.:p

Well please do not conclude from this incident that I hate animals. If it would have been the case, I would have never allowed “Laila”, the dog; secretly in my room, whom I found in the pit, at the road side. I brought her home and allowed her to share my place. I always knew that my parents do not like pets. Therefore, while going to primary school, I used to drop her out in the playground and after coming back from school, I allow her the back-door entry. Since, my house was huge and enough free space was available at the backyard, so I easily managed to give Laila her dormitory, near the well under the tree shelter. She also knew the fact that I am secretly keeping her, so she never barked at night. Alas! Again, my mother one day discovered the she-dog and asked me to drop her far away from the home. With no other choice I did so. I dropped her to some unknown place and came back. But this was not the last time when I saw her. She surprised me after two months, when I saw her at my gate with 6 puppies!!!

Now, Laila and her six kids are happily living with my parents, legally inside my house, with a minor change in the situation, that now they are in and I am out of my house, in Gurukul.

I will never say that it was my parent’s fault to send me to a boarding school at such an early age but “Hero” in me was so sharp and curious that they chose “Gurukul” to develop the true “Heroic” deeds in me.

“Baba……baba…. bachao...maa marche'' Hanu’s voice jerked me from my flashback memory.

Her mother was running after him with a broom. The enquiry about his boo-boo made me to discover the level of his puckishness! He used my highly expensive, recently bought sweater from Japan, as a bed cover for the kittens, whom he found at the terrace. The very act of kindness was done with the thought that the soft kittens might need a soft blanket to keep safe their soft skin from harsh cold.

With the age, I am slow now but still hunt for such incidents. When I see my boy, the entire

Life flashes on, I see all the objects are floating around and I try to recollect those secretly. Sometimes, I feel I speak too much about the life but it’s hard to stop when there are so much wonders. ‘My heart feels like a balloon which is about to burst...then I remember to relax and stop trying to hold on to it and then it flows through me like rain and I cant feel anything but gratitude for every single moment of my stupid little life’.

Hmmmmmmmmmmm (a deep sigh)………I am deeply thinking…in fact seriously thinking…....if I should admit Hanu to a boarding school???

Pulse of Change

                  

Mineralized thoughts, dancing at the backyard of my cerebrum, usually drums hard to pay it heels with the rhythm of life. Most of the time, you will spot me out trying to analyze myself. I, very often, examine my skeleton, staying alive in my family’s cupboard, to learn the flavors of life. The need is to chalk out my very own trend of evolution. Huh!!….let me not sound like a complicated She-Ox, in simple, I wish to scrutinize the transformation under the two categories “Before” and “After” to finally analyze the resultant “Change” derived from the said vectors.

The abovementioned two categories are very universal, usually when, you drive back your machinery to a SISS (self improvable service station).

Well, it is said that curiosity is the mother of all the inventions. It is true then also when you are inquisitive about yourself. You do self analysis and end up knowing/ discovering a hidden attribute. With every eye the reason of conducting a self-analysis may differ, but I am pretty sure that the backbone of this exercise says “Reveal to me my own very secrets”.

I know, we all very often undertake this exercise to understand the scientology of life’s ways and the impact of the changed us on our daily routines. Therefore, I too followed the methodology to do self-analysis through knowing the change in me. After analyzing, a list was prepared of the changes that have happened to me recent past years.

Aah!  Strange it was for me to discover that most of the times it is the simple things that changed my life. I, mainly, react and mind small things and easily forgive and forget big things.

So, after completing the self-analysis appraisal form, I finally reached to a conclusion that “Yes! I have changed a lot and all the changes were positive, the change was for improvement and the change was for better me”

Issshh!! I believe this was the only mistake that I made. Uff! I declared the above mentioned statement so clearly and so confidently that it gave a good faith chance to memory to challenge my say.

For challenging me, It took the said example:-

It happened few months back, when I was out in Delhi, for some regular shopping. To return back to my sister’s place (in Delhi) I started looking for a rickshaw. I tried to negotiate the fare amount with many rickshaw pullers but none was ready to compromise. But, finally I got one, who himself came and showed interest in dropping me at the price that suits me. While dropping me back home, he enquired, if I have friends who uses rickshaw very frequently. He further, offered the charges which are at our convenience level. He told me that he is in urgent need of money as his son is hospitalized, where he daily needs to pay Rs.250 and thus he needs to make sure of this minimum earnings on daily basis. 

I heard his tale with full patience. I will call it as “tale” only because I did not believe him. I remember, somebody once told me to check out person’s eyes to know the “truth”. But irony is, people are getting smarter day by day…………….they can easily lie and fool you with full emotions…..so for me this option never works……..I personally believe a person, only when he proves his words and for this you need time!!....but here we lacked time.

So, thing was, I didn’t trust him. I told him “Sorry bhaiya! I cannot help you. I do not stay in Delhi and I have no friends here and moreover with money also I cannot help!”

After saying this, I left the rickshaw.

Hell! My reminiscence acts very strong when it has to blame or question me.

By looking at this incident, I wasn’t able to judge the genuineness of the rickshaw puller. If I would have been earlier Shweta I would have definitely helped him out with some money no matter if he is genuine or fake. A life would have matter more to me than a feel that I am getting fooled by someone. But you see, I am a changed Shweta!!

Problem is being emotional we always have to pay heavy price and it’s not good to keep doing so. The Wikipedia definition of “Emotional Stability” defines it as “the state of an individual that enables him or her to have appropriate feelings about common experiences and act in a rational manner”. But crisis is, we many a times, fail in maintaining the “Emotional Stability” and ignore the genuine call.

The above example was just a simple case taken to show the other side of the change. The more complex and guilt making case will come if you were solely responsible for making someone’s life heaven by showing your concern in the needed situation, but that time you didn’t pay heed and thus by default became the reason for other’s crashed life/situation.

I suppose we did not change as we grew older; we just get our trueself more diluted….we loose ourselves in this fast track…….and if I visualize the other side of the coin I see “If you don't create change, change will create you” and if a change is forcible i.e. the rude surroundings and the modern culture forced you for the change…….umm…let me call it as “Adoption of Necessary Evil” then also we are explicit to miss our true character.

The hypothesis “Adoption of Necessary Evil” is not practiced by us right from the beginning but we start cultivating it during our developmental years. We all in our lives, come across with some real good, gigantic bamboozler’s who knowingly/unknowingly participates as a foundational brick in building and confirming our emotional permanence, so that in near future our surroundings can witness a Stronger Us. 

We definitely cannot change our past. We cannot change the fact that people act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude. But problem is “Are we really efficient enough, to maintain every time, the balance in our new gained attitude?”

The final un-answered question is: “Does Change always come bearing gifts?”

Zara itna to bata do

Mujhmain hee baske mujhse hee kaunsi ye tasveer banwa rahe ho
Ye kaunsee chaal hai tumhari manjil tak pahuchane ki, jo itni der laga rahe ho

Zara itna to bata do O mere Sai

Pata nahi ki koi saza de rahe ho, yaa yun hi mushkilo se mera saamna kara rahe ho
Badhi huee uljhan ko tum aur uljha rahe ho, meri zameen ki chadar ko bhi kyun le jaa rahe ho

Zara itna to bata do O mere Sai

Sangharsh ke iss registaan mai, dhoop se mera kajal jala rahe ho, aankho main base iss samundar ko kyun sukha rahe ho

Jiss tarannum ko hum gungunana nahi chahate, kasak ki ussi darakht pe, humain kyun baar baar aazama rahe ho

Zara itna to bata do O mere Sai

Roj raat sitaaro ka kaarawaan dikhaake, Kal......kal aur kal kehke meri zindagi ke ye anmol pal kyun chura rahe ho

Aasha ke baandh pe chalti saanso ki lehar ko, tum aasamaan se bhi aage ka raasta kyun dikha rahe ho

Zara itna to bata do O mere Sai

Daldal main phasi kashti ko kinaare ka intezaar kara rahe ho, kyun uss bhujhate hue diye ka bharosa utha rahe ho

O mere Sai, zara itna to bata do ke…………….

Jindagi ki Paheli

jindagi ne noore-nazar barsaya humpe

jab humain iski chahat naa thee

bin maange who sab mila

jiski humain kabhi khwahish bhi naa thee

fir jindagi aayi dobara se

apni kashti ke saath hamare ghaat

par iss baar rehmo-karam nahi tha iska humpe

ye to dene aaye thee bas humain aghaat

taqdeer ke ek ishaare pe dekho

kaisa isne khel dikhaya

veeran kiya mann ka nagar

aur humko seedhe jannat se jameen ka raasta dikhlaya

tauba! loota bhi humko isne tabhi

jab chalkaate firte the hum apni khushi ki ye nami

fir kya tha, hazaar sawaal uthaye humne

aur dekha idhar udhar bhi

tab pata chala ki

ye hai bas ek bhanwar hee

ghoom fir kar wapas aa gaye hum apni takleef ke ghar

aur sochne lage hum yahee har pahar

kya paheli hai ye jindagi

kabhi deti hai khushi aur kabhi deti hai kami

cheena-jhapti ke iss dwandh main aakhir humne jaana itna hee

pyaaz ke chilke ki tarah hai ye hamaree reh-guzar bhi

jitna bhi cheelo, paaoge ek aur nayi lehar

aur saath main ro-oge bhi, dekhar wahee puranee dagar

kaash hota itna aasan

iss paheli ko samajhna

khota naa koi fir, kal aaj aur kal apna

isliye jaane dete hai

iske rang dhang ko samajhne ki yee baat

socho bas itna ki

hoti hai hariyali har tabahee ke bhi baad!!

Mistakenly Mistaken Mistake

“Perfection of Wisdom”. I was / am looking for it since quite a few months. Since my childhood, I have been making my share of mistakes, nothing unique to mention; as we all commit it, and after every incident I used to think and say to myself confidently that I have become wise now and can manage any kind of unseen circumstances. So, playing as a true role of an optimistic moron, I every time thanked God for sanctifying that particular piece of distrustful cake and thus make my taste glands adaptable for the cursed curry. But somehow or it might be quite natural also, that we never stop from consigning a slip-up. We add up to our crunchy choco-bar with more mystical serious nut-cracker falsies with the passing time.

It was during my high school times when I realized that one should open her mouth by first observing the surroundings and should always indulge in a meaningful and sensible gesture in a public place. I got the beat of the heat when I was co-incidentally caught by a female teacher who incidentally was engaged with our geography teacher. If I speak of the incidence then at that time outside auditorium, standing in the queue, I was loudly speaking bullish about the geography teacher. The frustration and indifferent words spooned in my mouth because of the unorganized cultural program and it made me to utter “kya gadhe sir hain and humain bhi gadho ki tarah line main khada karwa rakha hain”.

Hmm….well….well……there were no major serious side effects than this that I got a thrash from his fiancée (a public and an insulting one too:-)) and also I never got more than average marks in Geography thereafter.

So, from here onwards I took a major lesson “See before you Speak”.

Well I, without any fail, believe that our faith is not rooted in mystical sayings that sound profound but actually have no real meaning. We receive and experience it first, and then only we believe it. But yes, definitely, I was not like this before. I used to believe and see without testing its real worth and without experiencing it. I semi-understood this fact, when I got a series of surprising comments from few of my friends whom I always considered good and well-wishers of mine.

Therefore, I took a major lesson “See and Analyze before you Believe”.

Hmm…..well I didn’t stop after my sessions of mistaken lessons. I corrected myself again.

Again! How? Let me tell you how?.....

Standing today I can confidently say “I  hardly meet a person who confesses that he/she is spectacularly stupid and exceptionally dim. Everyone try to be and prove to be at par against the person, standing in his/her premises. Their mind claims to think themselves as intelligent as a NASA officer and as witty as the “Great Chanakya”. Alas! Reality is spitted out when their pre-assumed mind frame gets a good skid with the barren, unruly and hidden circumstances that emerges out with the flush of a gusty air.” Now I know this fact but the actual truth is: I used to be one of those “ONE package” gentry.

So, I took a major lesson “See and analyze, but never assume you know everything”.

By rowing in a boat, decorated with blundered flowers, I have covered almost one-fourth (ideal situation) of my journey and have luckily/unluckily participated in committing small, big, serious, non-serious blunders. Also blunders which do not fall into previously mentioned categories should be equally taken into account and counted.

 Well, before moving further, I would like to request to the readers to not to take me as a descendant of a playing card joker. It’s not like that I do learn from my mistakes only and thus wait for the incident to preach me with a learning chapter but at several times learn from other’s mistakes as well.

I have seen people with grey hair who are extremely wise and have witnessed the hurt given by the strings of this bloody life’s hell prison. Many of them can be truly crowned with the Doctorate of Wisdom. Whatever they say is always right. Whatever they predict always comes true and whatever they decide is a worthy decision to follow.

But irony is I have also seen those very same Doctorates committing the silliest possible mistakes and I do feel sad after discovering the fact that “Even if you know almost everything you are still eligible to make a Mistakenly Mistaken Mistake”

Oohh la…la…..if mistake is quite natural, if mistake is meant to be committed, if mistake has got a permanent seat in the humane life-cycle and if mistake can never be avoided or terminated completely then why the hell one should think of achieving “Perfection of Wisdom”

All human beings, by nature, desire to know and are bound to know through Mistakes!!

                                          

Yesterday & Tomorrow

It happened few days back when I chatted with a Cuckoo at the dawn of the day. I conveyed to her all my troubles and asked her to carry my request of peace to heavenly world. I got relieved by knowing that at least she cared and valued my words, which I tried to converse in the early morning besides the lake. Breeze carrying the moisture of dew drops of Neem trees wrapped my elegancy and nourished my outer layer with hopes. Though it was a temporary gift from the puff of air, but I strongly believe that it met my moment's requirement. The yellow-golden color rising from the horizon of mercy touched my lips as if tending to pour in few words of wisdom and faith. People sitting and chanting mantras at the corridors of gurdwara forced me to question myself again- "If goodness prevails"? With such thoughts sprinting in my mind; I climbed down the stairs of Gurdwara to witness the holiness of amrit lake which in her womb carried the holy temple.

Well, after coming down from the gurudwara's terrace I viewed the grand lake. Stagnant silent water of the lake with its complete glory of grace somehow happened to smile at me with a peculiar curve. It was then when I raised my eyebrows to know the recipe of her cookery show. "Wait…wait Ms. Gupta", she gently answered but again daring enough to add it with a teasing whisper “let me pass the message which I have brought for you”. Meanwhile I too got interested in her fancy bait. It was then when I noticed chirpy water splashes of fishes. The emerging water ripples emphasized to try for the moment and secretly murmured, “You swim in the lake of worriness and think of not getting wet; why don't you change your swimming skills?” “Perception”….yes perception is the right word I believe which I can probably co-relate with the understanding of Life related terms. It's just the angle which makes us and the surrounding worthy. To worry is not the solution but to show concern still can be. Why not to make your own calendar where only two days in a week exist “yesterday” and “tomorrow” and above it why not to practice it and say “There are just two days in the week about which and upon which I shall never worry... Yesterday and Tomorrow.”

I Tried

I tried to cry behind the shutter of my eyes

I tried to smile to lie down to the world

I tried to update my outfit to change the pictures of past from my mind

I tried to visit places to stop myself from buying stuff from a hurt shop

I tried to meditate to concentrate on my present

Aaah.. I forgot to try to live in the moment, to know the real worth of the upcoming future